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Is there a right way to tell your spouse you want to divorce?

| Feb 5, 2021 | Divorce

Kentucky spouses may be wondering if there is a right way or right time to ask for a divorce. In a perfect world, both spouses are aware that the marriage is bad, have possibly tried counseling and expect that divorce is on the horizon. More often than not, this isn’t the case. If you want to dissolve your marriage, the following tips can help you break the news to your spouse if you haven’t already.

When both spouses agree the marriage is over

If you both can civilly discuss divorce, division of assets and child custody, set aside some time to do just that. Be open to negotiation and be honest about your time and financial limitations regarding child or spousal support and parenting time.

When one spouse does not want a divorce

In many scenarios, one spouse may not be aware the other is considering divorce and does not want it. Breaking this news can be tricky, especially if there is no ill will between spouses. Ideally, this is a matter that you should discuss in a private place. Do not involve your children in this initial discussion.

If there is a history of domestic violence, finding a quiet but public place to discuss divorce is recommended. You should also let a close friend or family member know your plans. Most people are disinclined to argue when others can see.

Plan out what you will say and expect anger

Having an idea of what you want to say will keep you focused. Your spouse may face an array of emotions including anger, confusion and despair. It is easy to show compassion for your spouse, but these actions can weaken your claim of wanting a divorce.

Do not place blame

Blaming your spouse, or even yourself, can prove detrimental and only incite anger. Be as diplomatic as possible. If you have children together, you will still be a part of each other’s lives for years to come.

Once you have decided upon divorce, you can begin looking for a family law attorney. It is important that you find an attorney you are comfortable with and trust to help guide you through the process.